Father's Firsts
by Kassia525
Summary: These semi-unrelated flash-fics depict Harm adjusting to life with the two young women down the hall from him (and vice-versa). Anything that isn’t HM friendly is pointedly ignored, as is anything from 'Hail and Farewell' forward.
1. Plunger 101

"Plunger 101"  
  
Summary: Mattie has a plumbing question for her guardian.  
  
Note: I've had an idea for a Harm/Mattie series since AGBF that I haven't had time to work on because of real work priorities (Lauren reaffirmed this in her review of Shifting Sands—thanks!). This is my first attempt at flash fics (155 word stories), and I kind of like the compact, time- consumption friendly format.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 22 February 2004  
  
*****  
  
"Hey Mattie," Harm answered after checking the caller ID on his cell. Mac continued shuffling through papers for their current case next to him on her couch.  
  
"That would depend on the reason it's stopped up," he replied to his ward's question. Mac handed Harm the folder that he'd been asking for when his phone rang. He thanked her with a nod as he continued his conversation, "What did you flush?"  
  
Mac couldn't help glancing at her co-council with a curious look at the peculiar question. For that reason, she didn't miss the look on his face when he got his answer.  
  
"Oh. I... didn't realize those were... flushable," he stammered. "But as long as it's not overflowing, leave it. I'll just fix it when I get home. You have the key to my apartment if you need to... you know... just don't flush any more of... those."  
  
Mac chuckled, "It's called a tampon, Harm." 


	2. Two for One

"Two for One"  
  
Summary: Harm got a two for one deal the day he invited Coates to live with Mattie.  
  
Note: According to JAG cannon, Harm was born in 1963. I'm assuming that Coates was 18 or 19 when she first appeared (making her 20 or 21 now).  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 24 February 2004  
  
*****  
  
Harm closed the door to Mattie's bedroom behind him after telling her goodnight. At the table, Jennifer Coates didn't even look up from her psychology textbook.  
  
"You might want to get to bed soon, too," Harm suggested.  
  
When she didn't respond, he took a step toward the engrossed student.  
  
"Jenn?" he tried again.  
  
"Hmm?" she perked up at the sound of her name.  
  
"You know, you'd probably get more studying done after a good night's sleep."  
  
"Yes, Dad," the young woman mockingly replied.  
  
Harm froze.  
  
Jenn couldn't help but laugh out loud when she saw his reaction to the paternal title. "You shouldn't look so shocked--you may be Mattie's guardian, but you look after me, too. And technically, you're old enough to be my father."  
  
"Technically, I suppose you're right," he responded slowly after doing the math in his head.  
  
"Goodnight," she grinned as she turned back to her book.  
  
"Go to bed, Jenn." 


	3. Sisterly Empathy

"Sisterly Empathy"  
  
Summary: If Harm's the dad in this game of house, then Mattie and Jennifer are sisters. And who understands what a girl goes through better than her older sister?  
  
Note: I did what Jenn tells Mattie about when I was in high school, except he didn't need stitches after he tripped.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 February 2004  
  
*****  
  
"What were you thinking?" Harm demanded.  
  
"He pulled my bra strap!" Mattie said defensively from her seat on her bed.  
  
"That's not a good reason to punch someone in the stomach!"  
  
"It hurt! And he embarrassed me in front of everyone."  
  
Harm sighed, dropping to his ward's eye-level. "I know you were just reacting, but there is this thing called *over*reacting. You can work on that while you're suspended."  
  
As soon as he was gone, she plopped back on the bed. A few minutes later, Jennifer tapped at the bedroom door. "Can I come in?"  
  
When Mattie didn't object to her being there, she pulled the computer chair up to the bed, "I've been in your shoes... the creep sat behind me. I tied his shoelaces to the desk instead of punching him. He ended up with stitches, though."  
  
Mattie broke out in a grin. "Thanks, Jenn. But don't tell Harm that story—he'd flip." 


	4. Snow Day

"Snow Day"  
  
Summary: Harm wakes up to no electricity and an invitation to join two very bored young women in their attempts to entertain themselves.  
  
Note: I am a happy teacher enjoying my beautiful snow day by writing fan fiction (thankfully, with electricity).  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 February 2004  
  
*****  
  
"Harm?" Mattie shook her guardian, trying to wake him.  
  
"My alarm hasn't gone off yet," he mumbled into the pillow.  
  
"And it's not going to."  
  
Harm lifted his head to look at the pajama-clad teenager. "What time is it?"  
  
"Doesn't matter. Electricity's out. School's closed." At his doubting look, she added, "JAG's closed, too. Jennifer called to make sure neither of you have to go in. Not that you could dig your 'Vette out from under the snow..."  
  
"I'll take your word for it," he grumbled, reaching for a pair of sweats as Mattie wandered out to the kitchen.  
  
Harm shuffled in a minute later as she rummaged through his cabinets. "What are you looking for?"  
  
"Graham crackers. Jenn and I were roasting mini-marshmallows over candles to make s'mores and we ran out."  
  
"Nice breakfast."  
  
"Options are limited with no electricity. You're welcome to join us. We can pretend we're camping."  
  
"I'll bring my guitar." 


	5. The Million Dollar Question

"The Million Dollar Question"  
  
Summary: If Harm's the dad in this game of house, and Mattie and Jennifer are sisters, can Mac play mom for a little while?  
  
Note: I don't want to get all shippery since the focus is supposed to be on Harm and his 'daughters,' but I have to throw in a cute Harm/Mac scene every once in a while...  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 February 2004  
  
*****  
  
"You're eating with us tonight?" Mattie breezed into Harm's apartment looking for dinner and found Mac sitting at the table.  
  
"The case we're working on took longer than either of us expected. I hope you don't mind."  
  
"Nah, he cooks better when it's not just the two of us."  
  
"Hey, I heard that!" Harm yelled.  
  
"You were supposed to," Mattie called back as she slid into her chair. She leaned toward Mac and whispered, "I need a female's input, and Jenn has class tonight. Can you help me?"  
  
"What's on your mind?"  
  
"How can you tell if a guy likes you?"  
  
"The million dollar question..." Mac mused aloud as she thought about it. Unconsciously, she turned to watch Harm work on their dinner. "I think it's when you realize that he would do anything in his power to make you happy."  
  
"Then Harm must really like both of us. I smell meat cooking," Mattie grinned. 


	6. Admiral's Orders

"Admiral's Orders"  
  
Summary: There's more than one way to skin a cat, or in this case, get a sick officer to stay home.  
  
Note: Thanks for all of the feedback! I love writing these because they're a nice dose of happy JAG in a season that hasn't given us much to be happy about.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 5 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
"Chegwidden," the admiral barked into the phone. He was already in a foul mood, and his yeoman was no where to be found to take his calls.  
  
"Um, this is Mattie Grace. Commander Rabb is my guardian," she nervously replied.  
  
"I remember you, Miss Grace," he said coolly.  
  
Mattie cringed, knowing he was recalling her 'bald jerk' comment from when Harm had been working for her. Swallowing her pride, she pressed on. "I'm sorry about that incident, sir... and I need your help."  
  
The admiral was intrigued enough to continue the conversation. "I'm listening."  
  
"Harm is running a fever, and he can't keep anything down. We're pretty sure he's got food poisoning, but Jenn and I can't convince him to stay home from work. Could you order him to stay here?"  
  
Chegwidden couldn't help but smile at her resourcefulness and sheer stubbornness. This teenager was a good match for Rabb.  
  
"Put him on the line." 


	7. Replenishing the Necessities

"Replenishing the Necessities"  
  
Summary: Mattie needs something, and she needs it now.  
  
Note: Living with a wife and three daughters, my father always felt a little outnumbered. It was his reactions to us that inspired me to write about Harm learning to live with the two women down the hall.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 5 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
"Can we go to the drugstore? I need to get something," Mattie said as she plopped down next to her guardian on the couch.  
  
Harm looked up from the legal pad in his lap. "I'm working on something. Can't it wait till tomorrow?"  
  
"Not really," she told him. "Look, if you can't take me, let me borrow your keys and I'll just get it myself."  
  
"Nice try," he responded wryly. "What's so important that it can't wait until later?"  
  
Mattie gave an exaggerated sigh and rolled her eyes. "If you must know, I'm out of pads."  
  
Harm blanched when it clicked that she wasn't referring to legal pads. He managed to stammer, "I, um, I thought you used tampons."  
  
"I use both."  
  
The look on his face was priceless. "You can do that?"  
  
"Uh, yeah," she said, incredulous that he could be so clueless at times. "So, can we go?"  
  
"Let me find my keys." 


	8. Appetitive Differences

"Appetitive Differences"  
  
Summary: The way to a girl's heart is not necessarily the vegetarian route to her stomach.  
  
Note: I needed to write a happy Mac scene, so here it is. And 'appetitive' is really a word (I looked it up to make sure)!  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 5 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
While her lunch was heating up in the microwave, Mac watched as Jennifer scraped the last of her yogurt from its plastic cup before tossing the container into the garbage on her way to the door.  
  
"Was that your entire lunch?" Mac couldn't help asking the enlisted woman.  
  
"That would be it, ma'am."  
  
"On a diet?"  
  
"The 'I can't afford better food until my next paycheck' diet," she forced a smile.  
  
"I'm sure Harm wouldn't mind sharing his leftovers," Mac suggested sympathetically.  
  
Jennifer made a face. "You haven't had his meatless meatloaf, ma'am."  
  
Mac laughed out loud. "You mean he didn't burn that recipe after how much I insulted it?"  
  
"Apparently not," the younger woman couldn't help smiling at that comment. "You know, some of his dishes aren't too incredibly appetizing. Mattie and I occasionally sneak out for pizza or burgers, which is what broke the bank in the first place."  
  
"I don't blame you." 


	9. The More, The Merrier

"The More, The Merrier"  
  
Summary: Mac doesn't think to call ahead when she stops by, but that doesn't mean she's not welcomed by Harm's non-traditional family.  
  
Note: After I wrote this, I realized that it shows that Mac has to adjust to the changes in Harm's life, too (so no more dropping by without making sure he doesn't already have plans!)  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 6 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
It took a second for Mac to realize that her knuckles hadn't made contact with the door in front of her because someone had already opened it.  
  
"Hi, Mac!" Mattie cheerfully greeted her. Jennifer and Harm were right behind the teenager, all three wearing their coats.  
  
"You're going out," she observed.  
  
"It's Jenn's birthday," Mattie informed her as the trio moved out into the hallway. "We're going out to eat."  
  
Jennifer spoke up, "Why don't you come with us, ma'am?"  
  
Mac tried to politely back out of the invitation. "I wouldn't want to intrude."  
  
"You wouldn't be," Jennifer smiled.  
  
She didn't look convinced.  
  
Harm finished locking up and joined in with a cocky grin. "Come on, Mac. The girls want you to come, and I'm outnumbered already. What's one more female?"  
  
"I suppose I could," Mac finally conceded, "but since I'm crashing this party, I'll pay."  
  
"I'm the father figure here," Harm protested. "I'm paying." 


	10. A Reformed Family Man

"A Reformed Family Man"  
  
Summary: Mattie drags Harm and Mac to see a movie.  
  
Note: It's not as shippery as it sounds, but it's got some cute Harm/Mac interaction all the same.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 14 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
Mac found Harm in the lobby of the theater, talking on his cell phone. Mattie had dragged both of them to see a movie, but halfway through, Harm had excused himself to use the bathroom. Mac was worried when he still hadn't returned twenty minutes later.  
  
Seeing her coming, Harm ended his conversation with, "Love you. Bye."  
  
Mac didn't ask who he'd been talking to, but her face betrayed her curiosity.  
  
He answered the unspoken question, "My mother—I try to call her more often since someone recently told me I was a lousy son."  
  
Recognizing her own words, she sheepishly looked away.  
  
"She told me to thank you," he added.  
  
"So, why are you calling your mother instead of watching the movie with us?"  
  
"Mattie made me see the same movie last weekend."  
  
"She's got your wrapped around her finger," Mac teased.  
  
"And you're immune to her powers of coercion? You came with us." 


	11. Trading Favors

"Trading Favors"  
  
Summary: The computer ate Mattie's homework, and Harm will go to great lengths to help her get it back.  
  
Note: I gave up reading fan fiction for Lent, so writing is currently my only outlet when I need to escape from the world for a while. Thanks for taking the time to type a few kind words about my little stories!  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time. Even though Trading Spaces somewhat inspired the title, I do not own that show, either.  
  
Written 18 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
"Bud, I need your help," Harm said as soon as his friend answered the phone.  
  
In the background, Bud heard a female voice scream, "Give me back my essay, you dumb machine!"  
  
"Computer problems?" he quickly guessed.  
  
"It ate Mattie's paper," Harm sighed. "She needs it for tomorrow."  
  
Bud hesitated, "I don't mind looking at it, but it's late..."  
  
"I'll bring it to you."  
  
"Harriet and the boys are in bed..."  
  
"I'll pay."  
  
"I couldn't take your money, sir."  
  
"How about I take care of the boys?"  
  
"I don't know..."  
  
"For an entire weekend?"  
  
This time, Bud paused to consider the offer before declining again, "Harriet doesn't like letting the boys out of her sight much since AJ ran away..."  
  
"You can take my Corvette."  
  
The other end was silent. A smile of triumph started to creep onto Harm's face.  
  
"I think I can convince her to let you watch them."  
  
"You're the best, Bud." 


	12. Trading Favors Family

"Trading Favors Family"  
  
Summary: Bud saved Mattie's homework, so now Harm and Mattie have to hold up their end of the bargain.  
  
Note: This is a follow-up to the previous flash-fic in the series (and alludes to Plumbing 101 at the end). Trading Spaces and its family- oriented spin-off inspired the title, not that this has anything to do with redecorating...  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time. And I still don't own Trading Spaces, nor Trading Spaces Family.  
  
Written 18 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
"Wasn't Harm supposed to be the baby-sitter?" Harriet asked Mattie while she happily cuddled her eight-month-old after an entire weekend away.  
  
"He owed Bud because of me, so I was obligated to help," the teenager shrugged. "It was a good thing I was here, too, because Jimmy would scream any time Harm held him. He wouldn't have survived without me and Jennifer."  
  
"Jennifer is here, too?"  
  
"She was. She watched Jimmy for a little while so I could get some homework done."  
  
"That was nice of her."  
  
"Yeah," Mattie agreed. "You know, I think it really bothered Harm that Jimmy wouldn't warm up to him. But he covered it up by spoiling AJ with attention."  
  
"I'm sure AJ loved having someone's undivided attention all weekend," Harriett admitted.  
  
"Especially after flushing some dirty socks down the toilet," Mattie snickered.  
  
"He didn't!" Harriett looked sufficiently appalled at her son's behavior.  
  
"Don't worry. Harm's good at fixing toilets." 


	13. Cramping His Style

"Cramping His Lifestyle"  
  
Summary: Mattie comes home sick from school, but Harm's not sure how to help her.  
  
Note: I feel Mattie's pain.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
25 March 2004  
  
*****  
  
"You owe me for the continuance I just gave you. Where the hell were you?" Mac yelled into her phone.  
  
Sounding somewhat distracted, Harm said, "Mattie's sick."  
  
"Oh." She hadn't expected that excuse.  
  
Harm continued, "Look, I need some advice."  
  
"I'm listening."  
  
"Mattie's having... female problems. She threw up at school because she was in so much pain."  
  
"Is she okay?"  
  
"Well, she's asking for someone to give her a hysterectomy with a fork."  
  
"Tell her it's a little premature for that," Mac responded wryly. "Do you have a heating pad?"  
  
"Yeah, for my back..."  
  
Mac interrupted, "She'll need that. Do you have a bottle of Aleeve?"  
  
"I think I've got aspirin..."  
  
"Go get some Aleeve—it's better for cramping."  
  
Harm couldn't help smiling at the way Mac took charge of the situation and started telling him what to do. "What would I do without you?"  
  
"Hopefully you'll never have to find out," she retorted. 


	14. A Simple Shopping Excursion

"A Simple Shopping Excursion"  
  
Summary: Harm takes Mattie shopping before their spring break trip.  
  
Note: Happy Spring Break to all of you who are off this week (especially fellow teachers)!  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 2 April 2004  
  
*****  
  
Harm looked at his watch and sighed.  
  
During Mattie's spring break, he was taking her to California to meet his mother and step-father. When his ward had told him she needed a bathing suit for their trip, he realized that he needed a new one, too. It had seemed like a good idea for them to make just one shopping excursion for both of them.  
  
Until now, he had only heard stories about how long women took to shop for clothes.  
  
Mattie came out from the dressing room in yet another suit and asked, "Do you think this makes my butt look big?"  
  
"Mattie, you look beautiful. If anyone is looking at your... behind, I will personally make sure that he stops," he replied, answering in male- guardian mode.  
  
"So you're saying my butt does look big," her face fell. "And I liked this one."  
  
Harm groaned as the teenager turned back into the dressing room. 


	15. Pierced

"Pierced"  
  
Summary: Being a typical teenager, Mattie does something to see her guardian's reaction.  
  
Note: Thanks to my students for informing me that they don't actually check to make sure you're 18 before you get a piercing, and to my sisters, who inspired me with their random piercings.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 2 April 2004  
  
******  
  
Harm did a double-take as Mattie walked past him. "What's on your nose?"  
  
"I have something on my nose?" she replied innocently, turning to give him a better view of the stud in her left nostril.  
  
Giving her a hard look, he asked, "Why?"  
  
"You don't like it?"  
  
"No. Ears are for piercing, not noses," Harm answered, trying to remain calm. "And don't you have to be 18 to get a piercing?"  
  
"They don't check ID."  
  
"So you lied in order to let someone poke holes where they don't belong?"  
  
"Well, yeah," Mattie squirmed.  
  
Deciding it was best for him to walk away before he got really mad, Harm said coolly, "We'll talk about this later."  
  
After Harm had left, Jennifer watched from her front-row seat on the couch as Mattie removed the fake nose ring.  
  
"Why'd you do that to him?"  
  
"I thought it might help the belly-button ring go over a little better." 


	16. Estrogen Overload

"Estrogen Overload"  
  
Summary: Harm could use some time away from Mattie and Jenn.  
  
Note: I suppose you could call this the sequel to "Pierced." This one is dedicated to my dad for all that my sisters and I have ever and will ever put him through.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 2 April 2004  
  
******  
  
"How was your weekend?" Mac asked cheerfully.  
  
"Fine," Harm grumbled.  
  
Braving his foul mood, she ventured into his office. "You're not very convincing."  
  
"Do you really want to know?" he scowled.  
  
"Sure," she plastered on a smile and sat down.  
  
Harm eyed his friend for a moment before he started venting. "Mattie and I were fighting because she got a nose ring, which turned out to be a fake. She just wanted to see my reaction before showing me her belly-button ring. My other daughter-by-default was upset when I couldn't fix her car, which broke down on the way home Friday. She complained about the repair bill all weekend long. I had to deal with two extremely emotional women for two days."  
  
"Do you feel better now that you've gotten that out of your system?" Mac asked, struggling not to laugh.  
  
He glared at her. "My adopted daughters PMS all the time. Why can't I?" 


	17. Burying the Hatchet

"Burying the Hatchet"  
  
Summary: Harm and Mattie have had enough of the silent treatment.  
  
Note: This would be the end of the trilogy that started with "Pierced." A great big thanks to alicia, katydid13, and Trish for their quick reviews to the first two parts, and thank you to all of the reviews that came before. You all keep me motivated to do this.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 10 April 2004  
  
******  
  
Having had enough of the charged silence, Jennifer politely excused herself from the dinner table saying she had to study. Harm and Mattie continued pushing their food around their plates, neither wanting to be the first to relent.  
  
Eventually the silence got to them, too.  
  
"Harm, look..."  
  
"Mattie, I ..."  
  
They smiled uneasily at each other as they both spoke at the same time.  
  
"Ladies first," Harm offered.  
  
"I should have asked you for permission before I got my piercing. I'm sorry," she nearly choked on the last two words, but she did it.  
  
"I'm sorry, too," Harm responded, swallowing his pride. "I may have overreacted. Being new to this whole parenting thing, I wasn't sure what to do."  
  
"Tell you what," Mattie said, "to make it up to you, I'll cook dinner tomorrow."  
  
"Is that a reward or a punishment?"  
  
"If it's a punishment, it's only a reflection on your teaching skills," she smirked. 


	18. Bloodletting

"Bloodletting"  
  
Summary: Mattie goes hunting for Band-Aids. Anything more would tell the entire story.  
  
Note: My taxes are done, are yours? Lauren, Sarah, Cathy F., Lyssa Grace, cmaf, Tez, bloodredcherry, and Uzma—thanks for the feedback.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 15 April 2004  
  
******  
  
Sporting a fuzzy bathrobe and a towel turban, Mattie tapped on her roommate's door. "Do you have any Band-Aids?"  
  
"If I do, they're under the sink," Jennifer hollered back.  
  
"Note to self: buy Band-Aids," Mattie muttered as she hobbled out of the apartment. She let herself into Harm's loft when she found the door unlocked.  
  
"What's up, kiddo?" her guardian looked up from a file.  
  
"Do you have any Band-Aids?"  
  
"Let me check."  
  
A minute later, Harm reappeared with a box of Band-Aids to find Mattie with her foot on a chair, pulling a blood-soaked tissue off of her ankle.  
  
"What did you do?" he exclaimed when he saw the gash underneath.  
  
"I decided to slit my ankle with a disposable razor," she told him sarcastically.  
  
"It looks painful."  
  
"You should try shaving off some of your skin," she retorted dryly. "Now if it would only stop bleeding long enough to put on a Band-Aid..." 


	19. How to Domesticate a Bachelor in 5 Month

"How to Domesticate a Bachelor in 5 Months"  
  
Summary: Harm has unwittingly succumbed to domestic life.  
  
Note: Real life is responsible for the wait between chapters—thank you for your patience. TPTB may need to brush up on their knowledge of high school because volleyball is NOT during the spring (that's been annoying me since whichever episode suggested it was...)  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 April 2004  
  
******  
  
"Going somewhere, sailor?" Mac asked half-seriously as Harm gathered some papers from the conference room table.  
  
"I have to pick Mattie up from volleyball practice."  
  
"I thought volleyball season was in the fall."  
  
Harm gave her a quizzical look, wondering why she knew that random bit of information. "Mattie had to quit the team last semester. She's on a rec team now."  
  
"Chloe played last year," Mac shared distractedly, trying to refocus on her paperwork. "So, are you coming back to help me finish up?"  
  
"Of course, but I'll be gone a while. I'm in charge of the carpool today."  
  
He wasn't sure whether he should be annoyed or upset when she burst out laughing. "What's so funny?"  
  
She managed to stifle her giggles long enough to reply, "You're going domestic on me. I never would have imagined you as part of a carpool."  
  
"Get back to work," he mock-ordered before slipping out the door. 


	20. Parenting Unplugged

"Parenting Unplugged"  
  
Summary: Successfully enforcing discipline is the hardest part of working with teenagers.  
  
Note: I work with teenagers, and it's so hard to motivate them to do anything they don't feel like doing. This chapter is brought to you by procrastination—I should be writing lesson plans and grading spoken exams (for my aforementioned inactive adolescents).  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 April 2004  
  
******  
  
"I thought I asked you to clean your room." Harm was trying to be stricter in order to compensate for the fact that he'd been wrapped around Mattie's finger even before she'd moved in.  
  
The teenager looked away from the computer screen to survey her bedroom. "It's not bad. You can still see most of the floor. And what's the point of making my bed if I'm just going to sleep in it again?"  
  
She turned back to her computer with a dismissive shrug. Before she realized what was happening, Harm had grabbed the mouse from under her hand and unplugged it from the back of her computer.  
  
"Hey!" she protested.  
  
"You'll get it back when your room is clean," he met her glare with his own.  
  
"Fine," she haughtily pushed herself out of her chair.  
  
Her back turned, Harm let out a sigh of relief—he'd finally managed to hold his ground with her. 


	21. Remember Me

"Remember Me"  
  
Summary: Mattie makes a visit on Mother's Day.  
  
Note: This was definitely influenced by the events of "Coming Home." I know this series is classified as 'humor,' but my muse told me to write this. Happy Mother's Day to all of the wonderful mothers out there!  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 8 May 2004

* * *

Mattie clutched a single rose in her hand as she slowly walked away from Harm, her memory automatically taking her to the right place.  
  
"Happy Mother's Day, Mom," she whispered to the granite slab as silent tears began to trickle down her face. "I'm sorry I didn't come last year. I couldn't believe you were gone... it was too soon..."  
  
A choked sob escaped, followed by another, and before she could stop herself, she was crying all the tears she'd held back for the past year.  
  
Harm respectfully kept his distance, allowing her to deal with her grief alone, but she was ready to share it with him now. "I want you to meet someone, Mom," she sniffled. "He suggested coming today."  
  
Turning around, she gave Harm a watery smile and motioned for him to join her. Taking his hand, she said, "This is Harm, and I guess you could call him my guardian angel..." 


	22. Studying Hard

"Studying Hard..."  
  
Summary: Mattie has to study while Jennifer gets to play on the internet.  
  
Note: The end of the school year makes free time to write even scarcer... thanks for those of you who are hanging in there.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 18 May 2004

* * *

"What were you laughing at?" Mattie demanded grouchily.  
  
"Just another story," Jennifer said casually as she swiveled her chair away from the computer to face her roommate. "I'd tell you about it, but I know you're about as interested in fan fiction as you are in the location of Namibia."  
  
Mattie made a face. "It's not fair that you get out earlier than I do. I mean, high school is supposed to prepare you for college, so shouldn't the semesters be the same length?"  
  
"You're right—it's not fair. But there's nothing you can do about it, so why don't you get some sleep instead?"  
  
"And why don't you let me borrow your computer for a while?"  
  
"Harm will give your keyboard back when finals are over."  
  
Mattie switched tactics, "You should get some sleep, too. Petty officers should be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed so that grumpy old admirals can boss them around, right?"  
  
"Good-night, Mathilda."


	23. Or Hardly Studying?

"Or Hardly Studying?"  
  
Summary: Mattie has to study some more.  
  
Note: Another day, another step closer to final exams, the last day of school, and the freedom of summer... I threw in a shipper comment for those who asked for one.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 19 May 2004

* * *

Harm hadn't meant to stay at the office so late, especially since he knew Jennifer would be out that night. Without bothering to stop at his apartment first, he unlocked the door to the girls' apartment, hoping that even in the absence of adult supervision, Mattie would be studying for finals like he'd instructed her to on the phone.  
  
Mattie looked up from her spot in front of the television. "I was beginning to wonder if you and Mac finally confessed your true feelings for each other and ran away together."  
  
He gave her a warning look, setting down his briefcase and cover. Choosing to otherwise ignore her comment, Harm asked, "Shouldn't you be studying?"  
  
"I am studying," she held up her Spanish book.  
  
"That's why you're watching TV."  
  
"It's a DVD... and I've got the Spanish subtitles on."  
  
"Nice try, kiddo. Turn it off. It's time for you to study the old fashioned way."


	24. Random Question of the Day

"Random Question of the Day"  
  
Summary: Mattie is already bored with summer vacation, so she calls to ask Harm something.  
  
Note: My sister asked me a similar question, and I didn't like it any more than Harm. Also, I'll be ignoring the season finale for the time being.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 30 May 2004

* * *

Mac sat on the edge of Harm's desk, watching him read through a case file so he could give her his opinion. When the phone rang, he continued to read as he answered with a businesslike, "Rabb."  
  
He was not prepared for Mattie's greeting.  
  
"Harm, when are you going to marry Mac so she can have a baby for me to play with?"  
  
Momentarily frozen, Harm could feel his ears burning even though Mac couldn't hear the conversation. Staring intently at the file in front of him, he finally managed a coherent reply, "I know that school is out, but please turn off 'A Baby Story' and read a book or... something. I'll take you to visit the Roberts later and you can play with Jimmy, okay?"  
  
Harm sighed as he hung up the phone. "Don't ask," he mumbled in Mac's direction as he quickly went back to reading in order to avoid eye contact. 


	25. Teenage Drama

"Teenage Drama"  
  
Summary: Female teenagers should come with volume control.  
  
Note: Even though my baby sister turns 19 today, she still needs a 'mute' button. Thanks to alicia5, Mia, Lyssa Grace, bloodredcherry, and Flamigo1 for reviewing the last chapter—it's a great compliment to know that someone besides myself enjoys these flash-fics!  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 3 June 2004

* * *

Harm opened his apartment door to reveal Jennifer Coates standing in the hallway with a backpack slung over one arm and the thick textbook for her summer psychology course in the other.  
  
"Do you mind if I study here for a little while?" she sheepishly asked her neighbor/superior officer/father figure.  
  
"Sure," he responded as he let her into his apartment. With a slightly puzzled frown, he asked, "Why can't you study in your apartment?"  
  
"Mattie's on the phone with one of her friends," she informed him as she settled down on the couch. "She's usually not this noisy, but apparently, some girl and her boyfriend had a very public breakup at the mall today. Either Mattie or her friend has a crush on the guy—I can't figure out which because the conversation is too giggly and high-pitched to understand all of it."  
  
"Thank God we have separate apartments," he shook his head with relief. 


	26. Decoding TeenSpeak

"Decoding Teen-Speak"  
  
Summary: Harm has to take his 'daughter' to work today.  
  
Note: Strange coincidence that I wrote two telephone stories in a row... Thanks for continuing to read and review katydid13 and bloodredcherry! I'm working on posting more sooner now that school's out, so enjoy.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 4 June 2004

* * *

Harm barely heard the knock on his office door over the steady stream of babble he'd become accustomed to that morning.  
  
Mac stuck her head in. "No wonder your phone was busy," she said knowingly once she caught sight of Mattie leaning back in a chair, winding the phone cord around her finger.  
  
"We have a meeting with the social worker this afternoon," Harm answered before she could ask why his ward was there. "What do you need?"  
  
Mac approached the desk, still eying the teenager. "Do you have the Baker file?"  
  
Harm looked through a stack of folders, quickly finding the one she requested. "Anything else?"  
  
"Do you actually understand what she's saying?" Mac could speak several languages, but could barely recognize teenage English.  
  
"Who? Mattie?" He shrugged, "Some of it. I've learned to tune out most of what she says on the phone. I only perk up if I hear my name now." 


	27. Male Observational Skills

"Male Observational Skills"  
  
Summary: Men (Harm) will never understand the details important to women (Mattie).  
  
Note: My sisters and I always did this to Dad, and he eventually learned the correct answer to the question. As always, thanks for reviewing laura carr, Sarai, Sahc, flamingo1, and jagaddict. I'm sorry, Mia, but chapters won't get longer because flash-fics are only 155 words long.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 8 June 2004

* * *

"I need your help."  
  
"Hello to you, too," Mac retorted as she walked into Harm's apartment.  
  
"Mattie's asked me several times now if I've noticed something different... She won't tell me what I'm supposed to notice, and she's upset that I can't figure it out. Jennifer won't give me any clues."  
  
"I need to know more if I'm going to be able to help you," Mac replied, amused at how agitated he was by his domestic plight.  
  
"Well, she tosses her hair and smiles every time she asks," Harm said, unable to think of anything else enlightening about the situation. Mac started laughing, which made him even more frustrated. "What's so funny?"  
  
"You, Commander Observant. My bet is that she got a haircut."  
  
"Why is she so worked up about that?"  
  
"It's a girl thing."  
  
"You don't make me notice when you get a haircut," he protested.  
  
"I'm not a typical girl—I'm a Marine." 


	28. Burial at Sea

"Burial at Sea"  
  
Summary: Harm learns why Mattie is so attached to her pet fish.  
  
Note: This is dedicated to Lazarus—he was a good fish. I got such great reviews to the last chapter! Thanks katydid13, Sarah, and AngelaB. Skates, I love my dad as much as you love yours. SMKLegacy, isn't it nice that the guys closest to us are the most oblivious?  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 10 June 2004

* * *

"Talk to me, kiddo," Harm said gently as he sat down next to Mattie. He was concerned about his ward—she was staring at her Betta fish, which was floating belly-up.

She sighed dejectedly, "As a kid, I was always asking for a puppy, but Mom said not till I was older. When I started high school, I thought I had finally convinced her I was old enough… until she handed me a fish bowl with a dog collar around the top and told me the fish's name was 'Puppy'."

The teen smiled at the memory before continuing, "I was so mad at first, but then it became our joke… and then she died… and now Puppy is dead, too."

"What can I do?" Harm offered.

LATER…

Harm and Mattie hovered over the white porcelain bowl, sharing a respectful silence.

"Poor Puppy—he was a good fish," Mattie said solemnly before flushing her beloved pet.


	29. Another Saturday Night

"Another Saturday Night"  
  
Summary: Harm is BORED and tries to remember life before children.  
  
Note: So much for my posting more during the summer... I've just been unmotivated to do much. Thank you to alicia5, AngelaB, cmaf, bloodredcherry, Lyssa Grace, and starryeyes10 for being motivated enough to give feedback on the last chapter! Flamingo1, your idea has definite potential :-)  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 June 2004

* * *

Harm reclined listlessly in an armchair and sighed, contemplating what to do with his Saturday night. His court cases would keep until Monday morning. He'd taken a long jog that morning, then spent the afternoon cleaning his apartment. Now there was absolutely nothing to do to keep himself busy because he didn't care much for watching television, and he couldn't motivate himself to read.  
  
He didn't particularly feel like being alone, anyway. Unfortunately, Mattie was staying the night at a friend's house, and Jennifer had been set up on a blind date by one of her friends at school.  
  
Harm shook his head in exasperation at his situation—what had he done before he'd become the pseudo-father of those two?  
  
A thought suddenly occurred to him, and with a grin, he grabbed the cordless phone from the arm of his chair and dialed a number from memory.  
  
"Hey, Mac. What are you up to tonight?" 


	30. A Day in the Park

"A Day at the Park"  
  
Summary: Harm, Mattie, and Mac spend the day at an amusement park.  
  
Note: Woo-hoo! Two chapters in a row! This idea came from spending a week at Six Flags (even though I was there as a volunteer for a Christian concert series, and I avoid the big rides unless dragged on them).  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 26 June 2004

* * *

"Are you okay?" Mac asked as Harm sat down next to her after riding the tallest roller coaster in the park... for the fourth time in a row. Mattie had to use the bathroom, giving him a chance to recover from all of the rides they'd ridden so far that day.  
  
"I'll be fine," he replied unconvincingly, "I just need to rest my back for a second."  
  
"You've been on every roller coaster in the park. Mattie can go on a few without you."  
  
"That would be admitting defeat."  
  
"To what?"  
  
"Mattie and I have a bet to see who gets sick first," he sheepishly admitted.  
  
"That's why you insisted on dragging me along today," she said condescendingly. "I suppose I'm driving home because you knew you'd be in no condition to do so after a day of torturing yourself?"  
  
"You don't mind?"  
  
"Not since you're paying for all the junk food I can eat." 


	31. Sugar Coated Study Aids

"Sugar-Coated Study Aids"  
  
Summary: Mattie helps Harm with the grocery shopping.  
  
Note: This is a story about my favorite study technique. Thanks reviewing chris-tonks, Sarai, Nighthawk5, harmsgirl and Alison. cmaf, my only excuse for not posting more is that it's summer and I'm feeling lazy.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 30 June 2004

* * *

Harm almost didn't notice that Mattie had snuck something into the cart as he pushed it down the aisle at the grocery store, but she made the mistake of looking back to see if she'd gotten away with it.  
  
"What did you put in there?" he demanded, stopping the cart.  
  
Mentally berating herself for getting caught, Mattie plastered on an obsequious smile. "Just my sugar-coated study aids."  
  
"Sugar-coated WHAT?" he repeated, picking up a cereal box to uncover the bag she had hidden, "Those are M&Ms."  
  
"Yeah, they are," she conceded while furiously thinking of what to say to convince her guardian to buy them. "I use them as a study aid—every time I finish a paragraph in one of my summer reading books, I get an M&M."  
  
"Where did you get that idea from?"  
  
"Jenn uses gummy bears."  
  
Harm sighed, "Couldn't you find something healthier?"  
  
"They're peanut M&Ms. Peanuts are good for you." 


	32. Puppy Love

"Puppy Love"  
  
Summary: Mattie wants something... a lot.  
  
Note: Inspiration comes from listening to my sister trying to convince my parents to get her a puppy as a college graduation present... and them saying not as long as she's living at home still... and from Flamingo1's review (thanks!)  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 30 June 2004

* * *

"Thank you again for letting Mattie spend the day here," Harm told the mother of Mattie's friend, Hilary. He knew that his ward was bored in the apartment all day long, so he was more than happy to let her go swimming at her friend's house.  
  
"It was no problem, Commander," the divorced woman smiled at him just enough to make him uncomfortable.  
  
Before he had to think of something else to say, Mattie bounded into the room wearing jean shorts over her bathing suit. She was holding a little ball of brown, white and black fur in her hands, and looking up at her guardian with pleading eyes, she showed Harm the puppy. "The neighbors are selling beagle puppies. Isn't this one just adorable?"  
  
"We can't have a puppy in our building, Mattie," he said as gently as he could.  
  
She frowned, but then asked, "So when are we going to start house shopping?" 


	33. Baby Sitting Blues

"Baby-Sitting Blues"  
  
Summary: Mattie still really wants something.  
  
Note: My sister actually used the baby argument with my parents since they told her they'd take the puppy back if she brought one home.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 1 July 2004

* * *

"How was baby-sitting?" Harm asked cheerfully. Bud had just dropped Mattie off from her evening with the boys, and she was making herself comfortable on Harm's couch.  
  
"I want a little brother or sister to play with and spoil rotten," she pouted.  
  
Harm sighed, feeling a headache coming on. He hated when Mattie came home from the Roberts' like this because it would eventually lead to her haranguing him about how he should be going out on dates so that he could settle down and she could play big sister to his kids.  
  
"I'm not going to lecture you about getting a social life today," she smirked.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
The teenager perked up saying, "You know what would be just as good as a baby to play with?"  
  
Harm groaned. "No puppy."  
  
"Would you rather I go out and get pregnant so I can have a baby to play with since you're not having one soon?" 


	34. Lost & Found

"Lost & Found"  
  
Summary: Harm buys a hamster to make Mattie forget about the puppy.  
  
Note: If you think back to the episode last season with Bud and the snake, you'll see why I used Sturgis in this fic. A great big 'gracias' to SarahRabb75, alicia5 (this fic answers your question), laura carr, bloodredcherry (I'll see what my muse and I can do with your idea), cmaf, Nighthawk5, and starryeyes10.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 10 July 2004

* * *

"What's this?" Mac asked as she picked up a small white box from Harm's desk and examined a hole in the corner.  
  
"Careful!" Harm said, reaching for it. "It's a hamster for Mattie."  
  
Obligingly relinquishing the box, she tried to keep a straight face. "Harm, there's nothing in that box except a big hole that was probably made by a small rodent."  
  
His face fell when he turned the box over and saw she was right.  
  
Watching him get down on all fours to peer under his desk, Mac snickered, "You better hope it doesn't find its way into the Admiral's office."  
  
Sturgis cleared his throat from the doorway.  
  
"Don't ask," Harm warned.  
  
"I won't," Sturgis replied, setting a wastebasket on the floor, "as long as you take this off my hands."  
  
Harm crawled over to the receptacle with a sense of trepidation. Inside, a dusty ball of fluff innocently twitched its whiskers at him. 


	35. Cooking with George

"Cooking with George"  
  
Summary: Mac cooks dinner with a little help from a "friend."  
  
Note: I've been sitting on this idea for a while, and I'm very pleased with how it turned out. I hope you all enjoy it, too.  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time. I do own one of the grills, but of course I don't own the rights to it (so don't sue me for that, either).  
  
Written 10 July 2004

* * *

"Dinner's ready!" Harm announced as he let himself into the girls' apartment. His smile quickly dissolved when he saw Mac and his two pseudo- daughters sitting at the table... eating a steak dinner.  
  
Mac gave Harm an exasperated look. "I told you I was going to cook for the girls tonight!"  
  
Harm feebly replied, "I thought you were joking."  
  
"Why would you think that I would joke about something like that?"  
  
"I've tasted your cooking," he reminded her, "You can't cook."  
  
Slightly irritated, she shot back, "Well, it's a good thing my friend George can."  
  
"George?" Harm repeated the name, looking around for this mysterious co- chef.  
  
Mattie tried to cover her amusement by hiding behind her napkin, and Jennifer snorted a few times trying to contain hers. Mac sat with a smug look on her face, enjoying Harm's little bout of jealousy before she slowly enunciated, "You know, George Foreman, the lean, mean fat-reducing grilling machine." 


	36. Fact Is Stranger Than Fiction

"Fact Is Stranger Than Fiction"  
  
Summary: Harm demands an excuse for why Mattie is late returning from an outing.  
  
Note: Sorry for the long delay! I had to pack and move, and then I had to unpack. Now I have to sit through new teacher orientation because I switched school systems... but an interesting experience with transportation home from our luncheon this afternoon made me wonder what the SUV stuck behind us was thinking...  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 27 July 2004

* * *

Harm sprang up the moment Mattie opened the door to her apartment. "Where on earth have you been?"  
  
"Stuck in a hot car in a parking lot for an hour." Mattie threw her bag on the couch and sank down beside it. Harm followed, perching himself on the coffee table in front of her.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"We got behind a bus in the parking lot when we were leaving the water park. Since everybody and their brother was out there today, not everyone was parked legally, and the bus got stuck making a turn."  
  
"Couldn't you turn around?"  
  
"There was another bus behind us, and when it tried backing up, it hit one of the illegally parked cars."  
  
Harm shook his head, knowing the story was too bizarre to have been made up as an excuse. "You could have called to tell me you were going to be late."  
  
"Cell phone battery died. Go figure." 


	37. Rude Awakening

"Rude Awakening"  
  
Summary: Jenn may never forget this midnight trip to the bathroom.  
  
Note: The last chapter was kind of random, wasn't it, Hide-N-Seeker424? But then again, all of these are kind of random... Thanks to all of my recent reviewers: Abigaile, Sarai, Hemi Magnum, bloodredcherry, cmaf, starryeyes10, KJFlygirl87, and BrokenSkye. This chapter is a follow-up of Chapter 34 "Lost & Found".  
  
Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.  
  
Written 31 July 2004

* * *

Jennifer barely opened her eyes as she groped for the sink in the dark bathroom. She wanted to keep her thought processes to a minimum so she could fall right back to sleep now that her bladder had been appeased.  
  
All thoughts of sleep were forgotten the second something grabbed her toe. She shrieked, stumbling backwards into the hamper.  
  
Moments later, she was blinded as Mattie raced into the bathroom and hit the lights.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
Jennifer pointed toward her foot, and Mattie turned her head in time to see something dart behind the toilet.  
  
She stepped over her roommate's legs to see what it was and laughed. "Dusty escaped from his cage!"  
  
"It's not funny—your rodent scared me to death!"  
  
"And you scared me to death! It's not like he could've hurt you." Mattie gently scooped up the hamster.  
  
"That must be why he tried to take a chunk out of my toe." 


	38. A Second Opinion

"A Second Opinion"

Summary: Mattie has more than one study buddy, as Harm is about to discover.

Note: I apologize to all of my faithful readers (and all of you newbies, welcome!) School started a lot earlier for me this summer because I decided to teach in another school district. As I tell all of my friends, teaching sucks up my entire life, but there's nothing else I'd rather be doing.

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 18 August 2004

* * *

"Okay, I will. Thanks again. Bye," Mattie said into the phone as she watched her guardian let himself in. The teenager was sitting cross-legged on the floor with her back to the couch and her school materials scattered around her.

"How's the homework coming, kiddo?" Harm asked affectionately as Mattie rolled her eyes at him. Trying to get him to stop referring to her as a kid was just wasting her breath.

"Just finished," she told him. "Oh, and before I forget—Mac wanted me to tell you she's going to mop the floor with your six in court tomorrow morning."

"When did you talk to Mac?"

"Just now."

Harm gave her a puzzled frown, "Why didn't she call my apartment?"

"Actually, I called her," Mattie explained. "No offense or anything, Harm, but she's much better at analyzing literature."

"I thought I did okay," he pouted.

"You did," Mattie placated him. "Mac just does better."


	39. A Closed Mouth

"A Closed Mouth..."

Summary: Harm's big mouth gets him in big trouble.

Note: It was great to get reviews from you all after not posting for so long! Thank you CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur, starryeyes10, GuitarVixen, Abigaile, and Flamingo1! I've wanted to write this story for a while, but waiting for the Olympics to start so that the story fit with the real world seemed to be a good idea.

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 27 August 2004

* * *

Mac was sitting across the table from Mattie at the girls' apartment, proof-reading an essay for the teenager. A few feet away, Harm was intently watching the Olympics. Without thinking, he commented, "How is beach volleyball an Olympic sport? I mean, a couple of women running around in bathing suits, hitting a ball?"

Two pairs of female eyes glared back at him.

"Are you saying volleyball isn't a sport?" Mattie bristled.

"Or women aren't good enough to compete in the Olympics?" Mac added.

"I'm just saying that because it's on a beach, it's doesn't seem so Olympic-worthy," Harm stammered, trying to talk his way out of it rather than admitting his error. "And women can be just as athletic as men."

Mattie turned to Mac with a thoughtful smirk. "I think some women can be more athletic. What do you think, Mac?"

Grinning, Mac replied, "I think you're absolutely right. How should we prove this?"


	40. Gathers No Foot

"...Gathers No Foot..."

Summary: Harm needs an ally—will Sturgis help him out?

Note: I thought this would be only two parts... I guess Harm's big mouth has a mind of its own. I'll let you know how it all ends up in the next chapter. Thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 27 August 2004

* * *

Harm had gotten to work early that morning and was staked out by the copier with an eye on the doors. As soon as he spotted his target, he abandoned his files to be 'copied' and maneuvered to intercept.

"Morning, Sturgis. Got plans for tonight?" Harm asked casually as he fell in step with his friend.

"Varese just got back into town, so I was going to take her out. Why?" Sturgis asked suspiciously.

"I need a teammate for a high-stakes volleyball match."

Sturgis raised an eyebrow, but otherwise showed no reaction. "How high?"

"My male pride is on the line," Harm tried his best to look sheepish. "I stuck my foot in my mouth, and now I have to face off with Mac and Mattie."

"So that's what Mac meant. When I saw her earlier, she told me to be careful which side I choose." Sturgis smiled apologetically, "Sorry, buddy. You're on your own."


	41. Or So Confucius Says

"...Or So Confucius Says"

Summary: Harm has learned his lesson... the hard way, as usual.

Note: Yay! I found a way to tie all three of these stories together! Hope you like the ending. And I'm very impressed by how fast you reviewed, CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur!

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 27 August 2004

* * *

"'Confucius says: Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it,'" Mattie read aloud. She, Harm, and Mac were sitting cross-legged on the floor of Harm's apartment in their sandy gym clothes eating Chinese take-out after their momentous game of beach volleyball.

Harm nudged his ward and said, "See? I told you that you're beautiful."

Rolling her eyes, Mattie passed him a fortune cookie. Cracking it open, Harm silently read his fortune and started turning pink. Before he could hide it, Mattie grabbed it out of his hands.

"Let's see here... 'Confucius says: A closed mouth gathers no foot.'" She nodded in mock seriousness. "I'd say that's appropriate."

Both girls started laughing as Harm feebly protested, "I learned my lesson, okay? You and Mac creamed me and proved that women are just as tough, if not tougher, than men."

"We did cream you, didn't we?" Mac smirked, "And we even let you score a few points."


	42. External Motivators

"External Motivators"

Summary: Harm and Mattie are returning from the gym.

Note: I finally get around to the subject I haven't touched on with this series... BOYS! My reviewers are awesome, as always, so thanks to CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur, Mia, hermiine, Navy Babe, mary48184, and starryeyes10.

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 6 September 2004

* * *

"I'm really proud of you for taking such an interest in your health," Harm told his ward as they climbed the stairs to the floor of their apartments. This was the third time that week she had accompanied her guardian to the gym.

"Uh, thank you?" Mattie offered as an uncertain response. She was more interested in getting back to her apartment and getting clean.

"Most kids your age are concerned about clothes and friends, not being physically fit," he continued as she unlocked the door.

Jennifer greeted them both with the question, "How was the workout?"

"Good," Mattie replied.

"Was Ryan working on his abs again?" Jennifer asked her roommate with a grin.

Mattie turned a cute shade of pink, answering the question without words. "I'm going to go bathe now."

"Wait a minute," Harm said as the teenager made her escape. "Who's Ryan?"

The only answer was the slamming of the bathroom door.


	43. Calling The Next of Kin

"Calling The Next of Kin"

Summary: Jenn needs someone to take care of her, too.

Note: I haven't done much with the Harm/Jenn relationship in a while, so I decided she needed to be at the center of a chapter. I can't believe people have heard about my story by word-of-mouth—all you who review are the best! Sorry I've been slacking on the posting.

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 25 September 2004

* * *

"Coates!" Admiral Chegwidden bellowed upon finding his yeoman dozing at her desk.

"Sir!" she snapped to attention, automatically rising from her seat. As soon as she was up, her knees buckled, and she instantly fell back into her chair with a groan.

Realizing this wasn't simply a case of negligence when he saw her flushed face, Chegwidden asked, "Are you okay?"

"Yes, sir," Jennifer replied, weakly attempting to stand again.

"At ease," he motioned her to remain sitting. "You are not okay."

"I'll be fine," she tried to protest.

"Yes, once you get some rest. Go home, Coates," he ordered.

"Sir," she sheepishly looked up at him, "I don't think I'm well enough to drive."

Across the bullpen, Harm and Mac were in her office finalizing the details of a plea bargain when they heard the admiral roar, "Where's Rabb?"

Everyone in the office froze.

Mac glared at her partner. "What did you do now?"


	44. Remote Control

"Remote Control"

Summary: Mattie and Jenn can't agree what to watch on TV.

Note: This story has been sitting in the idea pile for a while. It's evolved a bit from my original version, but I hope you like it. Thanks for the quick reviews Mia, Hide-N-Seeker424, KJFlygirl87, and Navy Babe!

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 26 September 2004

* * *

"What's going on in here?" Harm demanded as he rushed into the girls' apartment. Both Mattie and Jenn were on the living room floor, wrestling for control of some small object. At the sudden appearance of their parental figure, both girls stopped their struggle, but neither relinquished their hold on the item.

Harm held out his hand until Jennifer finally let go, allowing Mattie to hand the contraption to her guardian. He looked at it and asked, "A remote control?"

Neither girl would look him in the eye.

"I didn't want to watch some home improvement show, and she wouldn't change the channel," Mattie grumbled, rubbing her arm where it had hit the leg of the coffee table.

"I was here first," Jenn snapped back as best she could with a fat lip from her roommate's elbow.

Harm sighed, shaking his head. "I'll call and cancel the cable until you two can learn to share."


	45. Driving Hazard

"Driving Hazard"

Summary: Harm and Mac just got back from an out-of-town investigation.

Note: Thank you to all of my faithful readers! I apologize for my lack of updates—work-related stress has temporarily chased my muse away. And thus far, season 10 hasn't inspired me much (though there were some really cute scenes between Harm and Mattie in "Corporate Raiders.")

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 25 October 2004

* * *

On his way back from court, Sturgis noticed that Mac's light was on and decided to see how her latest investigation was shaping up. Knocking on the doorjamb, he stepped into her office and asked, "How was your trip?"

Mac looked up from her paperwork with a scowl that told Sturgis it would have been wiser to wait until the next day to find out. "Next time there's an out-of-town assignment with Harm, you can have it. I'm not going to be cooped up in a car with him again till Mattie has her license!"

"Bad back seat driver?"

"I threatened to leave him on the side of the road if he didn't shut up."

"You could have always let him drive," Sturgis pointed out.

"Everyone knows that Harm drives like a grandmother on Sunday afternoon."

"Then I guess we should ask for them to issue duct tape with the keys to a Navy sedan."


	46. Paternal Screening

"Paternal Screening"

Summary: Mattie gets a call from a boy.

Note: I haven't forgotten about my flashfic project, I just haven't had time to keep up with it. I think I'm going to end with chapter 50, so that means four more chapters to go! You may want to refer back to Chapter 42 "External Motivators" before reading this one. As always, thanks to my awesome reviewers GuitarVixen, Hide-N-Seeker424, Sarai, and Dreamer20715.

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 1 November 2004

* * *

"Hello?" Harm answered the phone in Mattie's apartment. He was waiting for her to finish getting ready so he could drop her off at the movies.

"Is Mattie still there?" a young masculine voice asked.

Harm's overprotective radar went up immediately. "She can't come to the phone right now. Can I take a message?"

"Just tell her Ryan called."

Noting that the bathroom door was still closed, Harm ventured another question. "Are you the same Ryan from the gym?"

"That would be me."

"How did you know that Mattie's going out tonight?" Harm continued his interrogation.

The kid started to sound a little hesitant, "She's part of the group going to the movies."

Harm heard the bathroom door open and knew his time was up. "I look forward to meeting you when I drop her off."

"Who was on the phone?" Mattie asked.

"Ryan," Harm said casually.

Mattie cringed. "What did you say to him?"


	47. Makeshift Massage Parlor

"Makeshift Massage Parlor"

Summary: Harm's giving Mac a massage while working on a case.

Note: Two in a row—can you believe it? This immediately follows "Paternal Screening." Both of these have been in the works for a while, I just needed time to write them correctly. Three more chapters till the finale!

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 1 November 2004

* * *

"Hey!" Mattie chirped as she let herself into Harm's apartment. She raised her eyebrows when she saw the startled adults pull away from each other. Smirking, she asked, "Did I interrupt something?"

Mac shook her head negatively as she intently looked over a file. Harm tried to find something to do with his hands, which a moment earlier had been massaging Mac's shoulders.

Mattie's smirk turned slightly sinister as she remembered how Harm had embarrassed her in front of Ryan at the movies. "If I didn't interrupt anything, why'd you two part like the Red Sea when I walked in?" she asked innocently.

Harm glared at her, but Mattie could see his neck blushing. "Matilda Grace," he warned.

"Harmon Rabb," she saucily threw back at him before turning away. Over her shoulder, she called back to them, "Jenn and I shanghaied the pizza guy. If you want food, you have to come and get it."


	48. Supper Surprise

"Supper Surprise"

Summary: Mattie cooks dinner.

Note: I'm sorry for the month-long delay in posting, but the weeks before finals are busy for the teachers and not just the students! With school out, I will be finishing the last two chapters of this series before the new year. It's been fun writing this, but all good things must come to an end, especially since Mattie is back with her father on the show.

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 21 December 2004

* * *

"What's all this?" Harm asked his ward as he hung his coat. The table was set, and Mattie was wielding potholders.

"I was bored, so I decided to cook dinner," she said as she pulled a dish out of the oven.

Harm sat down while Mattie spooned a serving onto each plate. After blowing on a forkful to cool it, he tasted her creation.

"What is it?" he asked after swallowing his first bite. Mattie was waiting anxiously for his reaction before trying it herself.

"Tortilla casserole."

"It's pretty good," he said, taking another taste. "Kinda sweet, too."

"That's probably the Cool Whip."

"Cool Whip?" Harm gave her a strange look.

"Yeah, the recipe had whipping cream in it, so I used Cool Whip."

Harm almost choked on his food. "Mattie, Cool Whip is whipped cream, not whipping cream."

"Oh," she responded staring at her plate. "Guess we don't have to worry about dessert then."


	49. Christmas Eve Emergency

"Christmas Eve Emergency"

Summary: Harm didn't plan to brave mall traffic on Christmas Eve.

Note: If this story were in real time (ignoring everything from Hail and Farewell forward), Mattie would be 16 and therefore have her driver's licence. Thank you's go out to my wonderful reviewers for the past few chapters: hermiine, Navy Babe, KJFlygirl87, littlemaccyd, bloodredcherry, and starryeyes10. Merry Christmas to all (including all of you lurkers)!

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 24 December 2004

* * *

Harm pulled up to the mall entrance and waited. A minute later, two warmly bundled figures dashed out into the slushy parking lot. He followed them at a safe distance until they stopped in front of an SUV, their breath coming out in puffs. Bringing his Corvette to a halt, he rolled down his window. 

"Remind me again why I had to come out here in the snow?" he asked the two shoppers.

"Because you had some last-minute presents to buy?" Mattie suggested, peeking out from under her hat.

"No, I distinctly remember telling you all that I was done with my Christmas shopping and was looking forward to spending the day at home where it was nice and warm."

"Harm, can you just unlock the car?" Jen pleaded, "I can't feel my toes anymore."

"You girls owe me," Harm told them as he pushed a button on the keyless entry remote for the Lexus.


	50. Learning As You Go

"Learning As You Go"

Summary: Bud looks for advice after the twins are born.

Note: You'll have to assume that at least one of the Roberts twins is a girl for this story to work. On a more personal note, I offer a humble thank you to anyone who has read my flash fics, especially those of you who took the time to review. This is the end of the road for me, and I have thoroughly enjoyed working on this series. I wish you all a safe and happy new year. Please enjoy the final chapter of "Father's Firsts"!

Disclaimer: Harm, Mac, etc. are not mine, so don't sue me because I have an imagination and too much free time.

Written 31 December 2004

* * *

"Sirs, may I ask you something?" Bud nervously asked two of his superior officers. 

"What's on your mind?" Harm asked. He and Admiral Chegwidden had come to the hospital to see Harriet and the new babies after work.

"I was wondering if you could give me any advice about raising daughters."

"I don't know how much help I can be," Chegwidden truthfully replied. "Unfortunately, I wasn't around much while Francesca was growing up. But in my experience, I've found that babies are babies—they eat and sleep. Gender doesn't matter too much until they get older, right Rabb?"

Harm groaned. "I've learned enough about feminine hygiene and adolescent angst to last me a lifetime. Buy lot's of Tylenol to survive the teenage years, Bud."

"Wait until your daughter is an adult, Rabb. One day she'll call to tell you she's eloped." Chegwidden grimaced before adding, "Then she'll tell you you're going to be a grandfather."


End file.
